The Night Mrs. Allison Made Me A Man

Now before you read too much into the headlines this post has nothing to do with a Miss Robinson type situation. This is a PG rated post because frankly that is what occurred.

To give some background Mrs. Allison was my 9th grade Algebra teacher at Coronado High School. Even after I had Mrs. Allison as a teacher my freshmen year she also tutored me into my sophomore and junior years. I have always had a very hard time with math, even to this day, but she was able to help me understand the subject and help me to get through my algebra and geometry classes.

Along with going to Mrs. Allison’s house for tutoring I would also go to her house and hang out with her daughter Mollie. She was my age and we had become friends in 8th grade. The Allison’s also went to the same church that I did. So I got to know Mollie and her two sisters Bonnie and Nicole very well. Much of my high school time was spent at the Allison house. Whether it be for fun or for working on my math I was at their house a lot.

Unfortunately after high school I did not keep as great of contact as I now would like to have. There are three teachers that I have had in my life that inspired me to become a teacher. One was Mrs. Allison, the other two were Mr. Briggs my 10th grade Social Studies teacher and Mr. Helm my 11th grade American Literature teacher. Each of these teachers had qualities that made such an impression on me that I wanted to be just like them. They all had a presence in the classroom that made me want to learn, made me want to be a better student, and made me want to be just like them. I knew early on that I wanted to be a teacher even though MY grades did not show that. Even into college I was very lazy about my studies. Yet even though I was not an accomplished student I always wanted to be able to have an impact on students, the same as they did on me. I have such a high respect for these three that anything that they would say to me I would listen to and honor.
So now that you have some background let me get into the story.

Time frame is junior year, probably October 1997. It was a Sunday night and my parents had picked me up from the airport. I had come back into town after visiting my brother in Dallas. We went out to eat and returned home. We looked at the Caller ID, remember kids this was before everyone had cell phones, and we all saw that there were a lot of calls from the Allison residence. Now one or two over a few days time no big deal, but 10-15 in a few hour period, there must be something wrong! So I called Mrs. Allison and asked her “What’s Up?” and she quietly and sternly asked me if I could come over to her house, she needed to talk to me. I was confused and said I would be right over. I hung up and my parents looked at me and asked what it was all about. I replied that Mrs. Allison needs to talk to me but I am not sure why. They did not think much of it and they just told me to drive safe. So off I went.

I arrived a few minutes later at Mrs. Allison’s house and she was outside waiting for me. I was a bit startled because I normally would just walk into their house. She asked me to sit down outside with her so we could talk. I started to feel almost uncomfortable. I was sure I had did all I could on my Algebra II exam with Mr. Aguilar, could I have bombed it? Many thoughts began to run through my head in just seconds. Then she turned to me and said “Mark, I have heard that you have been calling Mollie a bitch and talking bad about her behind her back. Is this true?” Of course being an idiot I looked her in the eyes and said “No!” When deep down I knew I had done this. I started to say it was not true and it was all lies. But we both knew I was full of it and had been caught.

Mollie had never once to this day said or did anything negatively towards me. Yet for some reason I had towards her. I had totally made the Allison family lose their faith and trust in me by saying things about Mollie that were not true, bogus, and out of character for me!

What had happened was a few months earlier I had broken up with my first girlfriend. And I was still holding on to a false hope that I could get back with her so any little thing would set me off. And for some reason I started lashing out behind the backs of some of my best friends. Why? I can not tell you. Teenage angst is very mysterious. But for some reason I thought that calling a great friend a bitch would make me feel better! I did not think that there would be any repercussions and that I would never have to own up to what I was saying or that it would get around back to me.

But it did! And here I was a junior in high school getting my ego, my pride, my cockiness, my stubbornness, my punk high school attitude ripped out of me, put on a platter then shown to me and then destroyed. Mrs. Allison stood at best maybe 5ft, and can you imagine seeing her rip into me, a 6ft 200lb guy? I had never felt so small in my life! But it was something I had to hear, and had to come to terms with. I had to realize that I deeply hurt their family, and disrespected them. I took their love and trust of me and ruined it. Instead of talking to them about what I was going through and my feelings, I foolishly started to push them away. And again, why was I picking on Mollie? I have no idea! She was a great friend, we would go to movies together, lunch, sit in church together etc. But for some reason inside my high school brain it made me feel better, but only temporarily.

Before I left that night Mrs. Allison made me realize what my actions had created. What kind of monster I had created. I was lucky that I had Mrs. Allison in my life. That night I was able to realize how my actions had made a family almost lose all of their faith in me. I was fortunate enough to earn back their trust, respect and most importantly their forgiveness.

Mrs. Allison knew that even after she had ripped into me and made me realize what I had done, that the worst part for me was yet to come, in just a few minutes. I still had to drive back home and explain to my parents why she needed to speak to me so desperately for that night. When I got back home my parents were sitting at the kitchen table and asked me what was going on. I sat there and explained everything. I did not beat around the bush, I did not say, “oh nothing, she just wanted to talk to me about tutoring”, I had to open up to them and tell them. I was embarrassed but it was something I had to do. Mrs. Allison made me a man that night. She made me realize my actions and that I had to admit to them (which I finally did). I had to come clean not only to her, but Mollie, and to my parents who raised me not to act the way that I did.

I am fortunate to have had Mrs. Allison in my life. She strived to make others become better people. She could see the good in people and was able to bring that out, even if it meant ripping into them and making them accountable, the same as she did to me.

Sadly though, on July 4th Mrs. Allison passed away. As I stated after high school I did not keep in touch with her or her family as much as I should have. I feel guilty now that I did not. I really could have used a lot of her mentoring for when I obtain my teaching position. She was a wonderful woman and I am very fortunate to have been able to have known her. I will always miss her and hope that I become a great educator the way that she was.

One of the last things I will always remember about Mrs. Allison is a few weeks before she had passed away she had made a comment about my son Timothy on my Facebook accounts. I will always remember and cherish that comment. It was so sincere and so loving. She was a wonderful woman and again I will always miss her.